Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Wheel! Of! Schadenfreude!


Falling simultaneously under the headings of "So dumb it makes me angry" and "I see why people from other countries hate us" is the insanely popular syndicated game show "Wheel Of Fortune". Actually, the show itself isn't stupid. It's a puzzle game that relies more than a little bit on pure dumb luck, but it consistently features the dumbest contestants ever. These people are so utterly lacking in basic brain function that if you stopped to think of the possibility that they might actually operate motor vehicles, you'd be so horrified you would never go outside again. Here are just two examples I remember vividly (and I'm not making these up):




"SHA_E AND SHA_E AL_ _E" showing on the board

Contestant #1: I'd like to solve the puzzle: 'Shake and shake alot'?

BZZZ!

Pat Sajak: Sorry, that's incorrect

Contestant #2: Pat, is it 'Shake and shake alike'?

BZZZ!



"HOW _ _CH IS THAT DOGGIE IN THE WINDOW" showing on the board

Contestant: Is there an R?

BZZZ!

Bzzz, indeed. And don't even get me started on the morons who buy a vowel when they obviosuly know the answer.
Damn you, Wheel, for making me happy when these people land on BANKRUPT.

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