A short conversation about the new Indiana Jones movie

"That was brutal. What a stupid movie."

"I don't know. I enjoyed it. It was fun."

"It was stupid! A terrible chapter in the saga."

"It was exactly the same as the other movies: he's a guy who gets himself into and out of impossibly harrowing situations while competing against bad guys in a race to retrieve some mystical artifact that he either loses or gives away in the end."

"Yeah, ok, but a skull? Made out of crystal? Come on!"

"Well, is that any dumber than anything he chased after in the other movies? The first one was a box of dirt that made rodents uneasy and people's faces melt unless they didn't look at it. In the second one it was rocks that looked like baked potatoes."

"Yeah, and in 'The Last Crusade' it was the friggin' Holy Grail!"

"Right. Jesus's magic pimp chalice. Neat. You know who else made a movie about a quest for the Holy Grail? Monty Python."

"Don't even try to compare Indiana Jones to Monty Python. That movie had Sean Connery in it as Indy's dad. Any movie with the baddest James Bond ever is automatically above reproach or criticism of any kind."

"Except he wasn't James Bond. He was a fussy, absent-minded zealot whose biggest scene featured him chasing birds with an umbrella. By that definition, there are probably six guys in any city park right now that could be Indiana Jones' dad."

"So you're saying that this was a great movie?!?"

"I'm saying that none of the Indiana Jones movies are 'great' movies, but if you get a big bag of popcorn, sit back, relax and enjoy them for what they are, they're a lot of fun to watch. And that's great enough for me. That's all."

"I bet you said the same thing about the Star Wars prequels."

"No, those were stupid, terrible chapters in the saga."