I had to do something the other night that I've never done before in my life... I un-Friended (and blocked) someone on Facebook.
This, like a lot of Facebook "Friends" was someone I'd never actually met in "real life", but I thought they were interesting and I respected them. Now, following a discussion that revealed a difference of opinion, I realize that they're dull, stupid, rude, obstinate, uninformed, inarticulate and ugly.
Funny how that works, isn't it?
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We disagree. So now, this is you. |
I don't know how this person and I ever connected in the first place. It's like trying to figure out what these keys are for.
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Seriously, I have no idea |
The difference being that I may find a use for the keys some day. It may sound harsh to refer to another human being that way, but it's Facebook. That's the standard, unfortunately.
What happened was this person posted a status update indicating that he's one of these people whose stance on bullying is that the whole problem could be solved if kids would just learn to get tough and stand up for themselves, That bullies respond to opposition, even if it turns out to be futile because for whatever of a million possible reasons, the other kid is just incapable of fighting back effectively, by either cowering away or by granting the kid a modicum of respect for the effort, like they operate under some kind of Code Of Honor. In my experience, that is a huge myth and it simply doesn't work that way. Bullies don't abide by honor and don't respect much of anything. They're dicks and that's what basically makes them bullies. And if they think they can impose their will on you, even if you try to fight back, they will. A kid who offers a slight challenge before eventually ending up crumpled in a heap on the playground every single time they meet is how most bullies define a good time.
Simply stated, when it comes to dealing with bullies, fighting back is not a one-size-fits-all answer for every kid in every situation.
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Oh, so you remember "A Christmas Story" but not "The Shawshank Redemption"? |
I don't have access to the conversation now (you know, because of the whole "blocking" thing) but I said basically that in response, expecting nothing more than a respectful debate between adults with different opinions. What I got was personal insults and profanity and questions about my own personal courage and ability to handle my affairs. I found myself wanting to respond at that level but caught myself. Why would or should I care about this person who I don't even know and their blockheaded, misinformed opinions about life and/or me? The obvious answer is I don't. So I added one final reply, something to the effect of "whatever you say, Facebook tough guy", and then hit the "Unfriend" and "Block" buttons. It was kind of unsatisfying though. Even though I'll never find out about it, I'm sure he and his like-minded blockhead "Friends" crowed about my departure as a victory over just the kind of cowards that are making this country weak and I win this argument, guddamnit. That bugs me a little. It shouldn't but it does. I can handle myself in a fight just fine (due to lessons learned from a youth spent as bigger-than-most-men with a hot temper) and I kind of want to meet him in real life and prove it to him to the extent where he either walks funny for the rest of his life, or one of his eyeballs doesn't operate correctly anymore or both. I shouldn't but I really kind of do. Okay, it bugs me
a lot. That's not a good way to react to the stupid antics of somebody stupid...somebody whom, once again, I DON'T EVEN
REALLY KNOW...so ultimately, I'm pleased with taking the action that I did. Still burns a little, though.
The end result is I'm left wondering why I was ever "Friends" with somebody like that to start with and what do I really know about many of the other people with whom I'm similarly linked on Facebook now.
I remember the first person I blocked. I thought it would be more satisfying than it was, too.
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