A short conversation about racism aided by the usage of poorly constructed metaphors

"I've discovered that using metaphors and similes enliven my vocabulary and help me express myself more effectively. Therefor, I'm going to start using them more than a million aliens at a carrot picnic. For instance, Mexicans are funnier than a new shrub with purple branches."

"That's so racist it makes coconuts look like a spoon factory."

"I disagree. What you discern as racism smells fishier than a donut factory in Kansas. And we need to be able to talk about it with one another!"

"Yeah, but that's like saying a needle-eyed trout is floppier than a back-twisted fiddlesticker."

"You make it sound like a homeless convict with webbed feet and banana hands. And that simply isn't the case."

"Well, I guess I can see where it would be like trying to stir fry a helicopter."

"I'm glad we were able to reach an agreement on what can be a complex and sensitive issue. It's like I suddenly have anvils in my diaper helmet."

"I've never wanted to run you over with a bulldozer made entirely out of machine guns more than I do right now."

(Thanks, B McB aka K)