Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Said without being said


Seriously, has there ever been a
guy named Larry who wasn't a tool?
 "And Friday morning on CNN, the chair of “Gun Appreciation Day” suggested that slavery would not have occurred had guns been available to everyone in America at the time. “I think Martin Luther King Jr. would agree with me if he were alive today that if African Americans had been given the right to keep and bear arms from day one of the country’s founding, perhaps slavery might not have been a chapter in our history,” said Larry Ward on Friday’s CNN Newsroom." -- Emma Margolin, MSNBC

That happened. I think it's important for us to expand upon what Mr. Ward expressed here, to fully illustrate the "logic" involved...

"I think Martin Luther King Jr. would agree with me if he were alive today, a condition which is impossible due to his being assassinated by James Earl Ray with a rifle in June of 1968, that if African Americans had been given the right to keep and bear arms from day one of the country's founding, a time when they were known simply as 'Africans' because they had yet to forcibly be assigned dual citizenship, perhaps slavery might not have been a chapter in our history. Because presumably those guys would have come over here, somehow gotten some guns, which shoulda/woulda/coulda been their constitutional right, even though we weren't really bringing them over here for the purpose of bestowing constitutional rights (let alone weapons!) on them, and said, 'hey, back off; we don't want to be slaves.' Then there would have been some shooting back and forth and I predict the white guys would have given up first because, in spite of being vastly outnumbered and not knowing what guns were before coming here, black people have proven to be good at adapting to their environment. Then the black guys would be all, 'well great, we won, but don't you think it could have saved a lot of trouble and heartache for everyone if you guys just hadn't dragged us from our homes against our wills to come over here in the first place?' and the surviving white guys would be all, 'yeah, but now you have guns. Lucky!'. Then one of the black guys would have said, 'can we play baseball and vote and court your women, not necessarily in that order?' and somebody would have said, 'whoa, let's take it easy! Give us one or two hundred years to think about that, okay?'. To this, the black people would have said, 'well, okay, since you were so kind in letting us have these guns and all. We'll wait patiently for you to grant us the privilege of being treated as equals and not take what we want by force, since, you know, we're capable of taking up arms against what could most certainly be accurately described as an oppressive government and that would be totally okay under certain interpretations of the second amendment', to which we'd say, 'hey, thanks!'.
And so, yeah, obviously no slavery, thanks to guns!"

3 comments:

Clare said...

You forgot to mention the fact that there was no stated right to bear arms in British North America until some 180 years AFTER slavery was instituted there.

Unknown said...

I am so pleased you caught that. I was really afraid that was just going to float on by.

Clare said...

"Glad I could be of service," she said pedantically.