Wednesday, November 02, 2016

What a bountiful harvest of aggravation!

If you're a recreational hater, someone who looks for things to be annoyed by just for fun, you must love autumn. I'm a comedian, so I'm a professional. I can find things to make me miserable all year 'round. But for you, the hobbyist, it doesn't get any better than right now. Fall is an all-you-can-hate buffet. Especially this fall! It's getting cold out. But it's not cold enough. It's still kinda hot out. But not very hot. It's perfect for complaining!
So many exciting, awful, wonderful, shitty things!
Check it out...


It's a drink. It's harmless. Some people really enjoy it. So what is there to hate about it? Well, it's a harmless drink that people enjoy. That's enough, isn't it?

College or pro, the season is about half over and odds are your team is in the toilet. Gee, was September, the month you waited for since February, when the season started and hopes were so high, really all that long ago?
Just about 100 days was all it took to turn your dreams of championship trophies and victory parades into two turds over easy with a side of hashed-brown shits.

The Cubs and Indians meet in Game 7 of the 2016 World Series tonight. That means no matter what, one group of fans suffering will be over, but the others will reach a streak of at least 59 years. Mmm-mm, that's some delicious Schadenfreude! Also, think about this: one group is going to be really, really happy and your team probably didn't even get this far. Everybody wins, except almost everybody!

It's the most popular show on TV, yet people can't stop bitching about it. "I don't like this plot line...this character should die...this character shouldn't die...this character should have died, but not like that!"
Blah blah blah blah blah. Every week, all the time.
So why do people even watch it, if it pisses them off so much? Well, because it's the most popular show on TV.


Yep, you're right. It's not even Thanksgiving.
Yep, you're right. These were up before Halloween.
Yep, you're right. This nonsense seems to start earlier every year.
Yep, you're right. The retail industry has declared a war on Christmas.


For the love of God already.

There's more, but it's making me angry just thinking about it.

Happy Hating!

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