Wednesday, September 07, 2016

I'm never going to play Mobile Strike

I'm posting this because apparently my multiple refusals to click on all those ads that constantly pop up on my phone are not enough and whoever is in charge needs to know
Never ever!
Do you hear me? NEVER!!!
I don't care how many cartoon Arnold Schwarzeneggers you throw at me, it is NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!

At my wake or funeral or whatever ceremony that takes place to commemorate my passing (I don't expect to be involved in the planning of that event), people may gather at some point and regale each other with the exploits of my life and one of those people may say, "Did you know that in his whole life, not once did he play Mobile Strike?" To which someone who didn't know me that well and never read this blog post might reply, "Did he want to?" "That's the thing; he never did!" That's how much I don't ever want to play Mobile Strike.

What's the big deal? Why not play the game?
Good questions with multiple answers.

1) I'm already playing a game. When the ads pop up to tell me to download another game, I'm already playing Tetris Blitz. I'm enjoying Tetris Blitz a great deal and ads for Mobile Strike hamper that enjoyment. Have you ever been eating dinner at home and seen an ad on TV for some restaurant that caused you to stop eating and go immediately to that restaurant? Of course not. That would be stupid. 
Oh shit, throw my salad in the trash. I've got to go!
Leave me alone and let me enjoy Tetris Blitz in peace.

2) To my own admitted (sometimes) detriment, pushing me to do something, even if it's the greatest thing in the world, is going to have the opposite of the desired effect, which is to get me to do that allegedly greatest thing in the world. The more popular something is, the less likely I am to want to participate.
Never seen oneogy, let alone trilogy
Why? Because I'm some hipster elitist douchebag snob? No! I just resent things that lots of people enjoy.
Okay, so maybe I share some traits with hipster elitist douchebag snobs.
At least I don't look like this though.
3) I'm pretty sure Mobile Strike is not that great of a game. Here's what's promised:
And here's what shows up as sample game play in the pop up ad:
Build a tower?!?
We're under attack and you want me to do carpentry?
How does building a tower qualify as "NONSTOP ACTION"? Where's my giant gun? How much mayhem and carnage can I create with a hammer and some two-by-four's? Build a tower? That's grunt work. What's next after I clear this level, the Hang-Around-With-A-Bunch-Of-Goofs-In-The-Motor-Level achievement?
Been there, done that.
In closing, if you're reading this, Mobile Strike Inc. or Arnold Schwarzenegger himself, please leave me alone. I'm never going to play Mobile Strike.

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