EXCLUSIVE! I have the legendary deleted scenes from Purple Rain!

(EDITOR'S DISCLAIMER FROM CLARK: If you are a devoted Prince fan, you can just skip this part and go right to the good stuff. Go ahead, this is boring. We'll be right behind you. Really, don't worry about it. Have fun!
Ok, now that they're gone I just want to let you know I wrote that headline so lots of Prince freaks like me would find this site on Google and drive my hit count up. Ha ha! Don't tell them, ok? Cool, thanks.)

What you are about to see here are the long rumored but never seen deleted scenes from Prince's semi-autobiographical film 'Purple Rain'. Well, kinda. I mean, I don't have the steamy extended love scene in the barn between The Kid and Appolonia. Or the fist fight at the warehouse between The Kid and Jellybean. Or the climactic samurai sword battle between The Kid and Morris at the House Of The Blue Leaves. Plus, I don't have actual film clips of any of these scenes, just scripted dialogue that was cut from the finished film. But hey, that's more than what Warner Brothers gave you in the 20th anniversary DVD, isn't it?

FIRST DELETED SCENE: At the lake
Apollonia: Will you help me?
The Kid: No.
Apollonia: Pardon me?
The Kid: Nope... Wanna know why?
Apollonia: Nope.
The Kid: Because you wouldn't pass the initiation.
Apollonia: What initiation?
The Kid: Well, for starters, you have to purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
Apollonia: What?
The Kid: You have to purify yourself in Lake Minnetonka. [She strips down, and runs towards the lake] Hey! Wait a minute! That's...
Apollonia: [stopping just before leaping in] What?
The Kid: Oh. Well, um, that ain't Lake Minnetonka.
Apollonia: Are you serious? I was going to jump in there! I could have gotten hypothermia!
The Kid: Yeah, sorry, I thought it would be funny...
Apollonia: Funny?!? Tricking someone into jumping in a lake in Minnesota in January is funny to you?
The Kid: I know, I know. I've just been going through some stuff at home lately and...
Apollonia: Look, maybe you're mad at your mother for some reason...
The Kid: Actually, it's my dad. He's...
Apollonia: Whatever. The things I do for a career in the music business. I think I just want to go home.
The Kid: Hey, don't get my seat all wet!

SECOND DELETED SCENE: Steamy extended love scene in the barn
Psyche! I told you I didn't have that. Ha ha ha ha ha!!

THIRD DELETED SCENE: In The Kid's dressing room
Billy: Let me give you some good advice, junior; Nobody digs your music but yourself.
The Kid: Well, that's an interesting observation, Billy, but it's not really advice is it? It's basically just your opinion and more of an admonishment than anything else. See, you've given me some criticism, which I didn't even ask for, by the way, but you've given me no guide to action. No suggestions to improve. So what am I supposed to do with your so-called advice? I suppose if I agreed with you, which I don't, I might try a more mainstream approach to my music or at least just try to incorporate some more familiar elements into my songs in order to reach a wider audience. But since, as I've already stated, I don't agree with your assessment, that probably isn't going to happen. But...thanks? I guess? I really don't appreciate it.
Billy: F*** you, Kid!!

FOURTH DELETED SCENE: On stage at First Avenue
The Kid: For the last time, no, I will not play 'Free Bird'!