Sunday, April 06, 2008

My audience with the Queen of America



The other night I was at the Seminole Hard Rock Casino where I saw Miss America 2008 Kirsten Haglund who was there on a publicity junket. This was a very big moment in my life. I've met many celebrities in my life but never anybody as high ranking as a reigning Miss America. I believe under the presidential line of succession it's the president, then the vice-president, followed by the speaker of the house, then Brett Favre and then it's Batman and then right after that it's either Miss America or the current American League leader in RBIs. I think that's how it's listed on Wikipedia. Not sure exactly how it shakes out but either way she's up there, mere heartbeats away from the U.S. presidency.

A little known fact about Miss America is that under rights granted by an amendment to the constitution, if you encounter a reigning Miss America in an establishment where it is legal to smoke indoors, you are allowed to request, and she is required by law to grant, two wishes for anything you want! Sort of like a leprechaun or a genie only much prettier. Unfortunately, I am not a quick thinker so the only things I could think to ask for were a personalized autographed photo (she drew the little heart without me even having to ask for it) and to leave the casino with exactly four dollars and eighty cents more than I had when I came in. And that is exactly what I got, which is further proof that democracy works, people!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your encounter with our monarch, very cool ... but I can't help but be surprised by her look. She looks so ... 80's - and not in the cool way that came back with skinny jeans and tunics. No, she looks it in the needs-an-eyebrow-wax and perhaps also in the needs-less-bang-wave way.

Oh, hey, I looked her up! She's from your home state ... and what's this? She's six years old? Wait, how old ARE people born in 1988? :(

Marissa said...

Well, isn't that special! I'm sure to the male species, this is quite a dubious honor. The heart is a bit over the top cutesy. The smile forced, but it might be due to the duct taping done to contestants to keep them from jiggling. No gurdles allowed, but taping is fine.
She appears to be straining to ensure a smile that displays her dimple.
I'm sure she's an absolutely charming, brilliant young lady. Really.

Unknown said...

Ladies, ladies: Mee-oww!
(These kittens have claws!)

Anonymous said...

Yeah! Miss America rocks!