Stay on target, stay on target...

You've probably already seen this (it's been around a while)...

Cracked.com recently featured it in one of their pieces and what I hadn't noticed before was the quality of the camera work that never suffers even while the spokesman might be, you know, dying. Now that's the mark of a top flight director!

DIRECTOR: Camera 2, zoom tight and pan slow right. Camera 2, ready...and go!
CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: Uh, sir? I think Jim is pretty seriously hurt...
DIRECTOR: Camera 2, you let Odell worry about that. Begin your pan now!
CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: But sir...
DIRECTOR: Now, damn it now!
CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: Sir, he's losing a lot of blood...
DIRECTOR: Smithers, relieve Johnson on Camera 2 and initiate tight zoom and slow pan right!
SMITHERS, NEW CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: Aye, sir!
JOHNSON, FORMER CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: What the hell is wrong with you people?
DIRECTOR: Goddamn it, Johnson. When you signed up for this, you knew it wasn't going to be all food processors and limited edition unicorn figurines. This is home shopping! And in home shopping, sometimes people die! Now Jim's a good man, and he's one tough son of a bitch. He may pull though this yet, but if not, I have no doubt he'd want us to spend the next 3:43 doing whatever it takes to get as many of item 1101-1816 into as many people's hands as possible. Now, I am not going to stand here and have you dishonor his memory...
JOHNSON: Well, I don't think he's dead yet...
DIRECTOR: You can't handle the truth! Son, we work for a company that sells swords to people sitting at home and watching on television. And those swords have to be televised by men with cameras. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Smithers?
CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: Well, uh, yeah, that's what I'm doing right now, remember?
DIRECTOR: I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Jim and you curse the Home Shopping Network. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Jim's death, while tragic, probably sold swords.
JOHNSON: Actually, I think he's stopped bleeding now...
DIRECTOR: And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, sells merchandise...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me selling swords. You need me selling swords.We use words like "act now", "limited quantities available", and "limit two per household"...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent selling something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the very same electric blanket that we'll be showcasing in the next hour, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you get back on Camera 2.
SMITHERS, SOON-TO-BE-REPLACED CAMERA 2 OPERATOR: Aw man, I thought you wanted me to run Camera 2 now...
DIRECTOR: Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!