Guest Blogger: Marissa Rapier

Today's special guest blogger is Marissa Rapier, the pride of Kankakee, Illinois. I've enjoyed reading her blog "Marissology" (formerly known as "Wild Hair") for years now, even though the content often makes me blush and sometimes Google what she's talking about and then blushing an even deeper shade of red, because I'm all shy and demure and stuff.
Anyway, Miss Riss has graciously taken time out of her very busy schedule to make a contribution to my blog, and here it is...


When I dislike something I dislike it with passion. Take, for instance, the band Bon Jovi. Gag! When Jon sings it sounds like he's taking a dump while razor blades are extruded from his anus. If one of their songs plays on the radio I lurch with a vengeance to change the station. Making matters worse is when my co-worker, whom I don't like to begin with, plays their "greatest hits." Yes, I put that in quotations because nothing is greatest about that band in my less than humble opinion. Talk about setting me up for a horrible workday. Then, I want to punch her in the face because she knows darn well that I hate their music. However, legal restraints keep me from doing so. It would be so cool, for dramatic effect, if I could rip the disc from the player and smash it with a hammer or some how manage the sound of a needle dragging across a record. Instead, I play nice and try to find a happy place. With any luck, the hot UPS guy will drop his package and bend over right in front of my window at the mall.

For many years I've compiled lists of movies and musical artists that I'd like to punch in the face. Not long ago it hit me that the vitriol inspired by these things branched out to other subjects, like pajamas in public or style being sported by pregnant women wearing regular pants but leaving them unzipped and unbuttoned to make room for their baby bump. The list is endless. Because of that never ending list, I needed a place to vent my ire. Wouldn't you know it! Someone else had already created such a blog and fan page on Facebook. Had this person heard about my lists or stumbled across my blog when I posted about the movies I'd like to give a knuckle sandwich or could it be possible that great minds DO think alike? Needless to say, I was slow on the draw. The creator, Jennifer Worick, claims she made the expression wildly popular. Uh, not exactly, but I like her style. I solemnly swear on Clark's blog that I had never heard of it until the phrase was uttered from my lips. She's the one with the published books. So, that pretty much gives her greater credibility, I guess. And for that I want to punch her in the face. Then, have coffee and point out all the things we want to punch in the face in our surrounding area.