Monday, November 04, 2013

Today's forecast: Love is in the air!

This is an email I received this weekend. Needless to say, I will be married soon:

TO: clark

SUBJECT: Don't get me wrong but you're really interesting to me...

Howdy, sweetheart! How do you do?
My name is Kenisha and I liked you so much right from the very first glance on your pics.
I like pals like you! That is why I wished to write this message and get an message for it from you.
So, let me tell u something about me! I'm a blonde beauty with perfect titties, amazingly long legs, sporty butt.
My breast's size is 2 and I am looking forward about meeting you.
So, do not miss your opportunity!

Wowie! First off, there's nothing sexier than beng greeted with "Howdy", is there? Not when it's followed by exquisite grammar and phrasing! Sure, we'll start out as pals (as is the case with any relationship between lovers or participants in the Big Brothers/Big Sisters organization) but she really got my attention with her physical description and I can tell we're soulmates!
"Perfect titties!" - Perfect, in that she has two of those PLUS one breast whose size is 2 (presumably 1 = small and 2 = big?) somewhere on her body.
"Amazingly long legs" - How did she know I like my women spider-y?
"Sporty butt" - Like a little red Italian roadster with racing stripes where the top comes down and the horn goes 'beep, beep'!

I do not plan to miss my opportunity so I'm writing her back:

SUBJECT: Re: Don't get me wrong but you're really interesting to me...

Howdy yourself, future pal! How do you do yourself?
My name is Clark and I am flattered so much right from your very first email.
I also like blonde beauty pals like you, what with your perfect titties, spider-like legs and butt like a convertible car! Beep! Beep! That is why I am sending an message via reply to it from me to you. How?
I am intrigued by your breast (not your titties; I get those. Perfect!) Please tell me, is it located on your torso, like directly beneath your titties, as though an upside-down pyramid of boobs? A size 2 could fit real nice right there. Regardless, I can relate as I have an extra buttock (it's under my testicles).
I too am looking forward around meeting you!

I can not WAIT to hear back from her!!


ronnyelliott said...

See if she has a sister, will you?

Clark Brooks said...

Hell yeah! Double date!

Michael Noble said...

Clark <------- has all the fun

Marissa Rapier said...

I"m going to copy her style.
it is official! Riss is on a MANHUNT!! She's savvy.

Owl Tree said...

Boo-cheer, you ar vild man! I am knowing you ar dryfink thees luvlee chickie-lady insanely weeth much hot passion! Pleas tu inwite Yenchna tu weddink! I vill bringing fresh feesh tu reception...