Monday, July 04, 2011

Happy Birthday, America!

I think everybody needs to really live it up today, the 4th of July, to commemorate America's Independence Day. Let's all enjoy and appreciate ourselves and each other and how fortunate we are just to be Americans and all the good that comes with it. Because it's probably the last chance for a while that we'll have to cut loose and celebrate anything like that for a while.
Think about it...
  • The 10th anniversary of September 11 is coming up right around the corner and even though Bin Laden is dead, it's not going to be a celebratory occasion. If anything, it will be one whopper of a  who-can-be-more-somber-and-poignant contest. Some people have already been practicing, the ones who gasp and are thrown into a temporary state of flashback-induced shock every time the numbers 9 and 11 are mentioned next to each other. A license plate number, a hotel room, the time of day, whatever. They hear the numbers and they make a big display of being overcome with "oh god, it's like I'm experiencing the horror all over again for the first time" before recovering bravely. Cripes almighty. Look, I know post-traumatic stress disorder is a real thing that people struggle with but if the possibility that a turkey club with a side of cole slaw and an iced tea might happen to come to $9.11 and that is going to push you over the edge every single time you eat at a restaurant, get some serious help. Or at least order something else.
  • After that, we breeze through Halloween, and that's fun because Yay! Everyone is dressed like a slut! But then we run smack into The Big Three of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years, which, based on the amount of bitching done by people I know, nobody enjoys anymore. I mean at all. Which makes me wonder why they (we) still do it.
  • It won't be long after that's all over that the 2012 presidential election process heats up and that mess gets nastier every four years. Get ready to have people call you stupid and tell you that you hate America. And the more you protest to the contrary, the more they'll say that proves how much you hate it until eventually, yep, you will hate America, at least certain chunks and residents of it. Last time we had contentious 'Town Hall Meetings" and people stepping on their ideological opponent's heads. This time, I fully expect us to just set each other on fire or pee on each other or both (but not in that order).
So today, while we still can, let's all watch a baseball game, enjoy some fireworks, eat something cooked on an outdoor grill and listen to some good ol' American music (whatever you're into, however you classify
"American" music: personally, I'm planning to lean heavily on a four man rotation of Glenn Miller, Buddy Guy, George Strait and Sly Stone, but I have Cuban-American neighbors and there tends to be lots of coming and going between apartments in my building on holidays so I'm sure there will be some Francisco Aguabella, Celia Cruz, Arturo Sandoval and Cachao López in the mix, which is cool). Because it's probably going to be a while before we feel like sitting down with each other and doing it again.

And also because HELL YEAH!!

1 comment:

Native Mom said...

You always say the stuff everyone else is thinking, but you say it in a more humorous way. Thanks!