Friday, October 25, 2013

You read the book, now drink from the cup!

"Hey, is that a T-Rex?"
Yeah, I said 'forest creatures', duh.
Here's a new item for sale: The Ridiculously Inconsistent Cup.

Actually, it fails to live up to the name in that it is really quite reliable. It will always hold a beverage for you to drink unless you break it or otherwise render it unusable as a beverage container, dumbass. Hey, look how much purple is on it!

This handy, dandy item, adorned with the cover illustration by Jessie Stehlik from my book, "A Ridiculously Inconsistent Treasury", was originally produced in a very limited quantity as Thank You gifts for the team who helped produce the book. Now I'm going to have more made and sell them to you, if you want them. The illustration features a robot reading stories to lovable forest creatures. Impress your co-workers by having the weirdest coffee mug in your entire company. It will be a great conversation starter and a way to drive more traffic to this here blog and maybe even help sell some books. Check it out:


"Well, here we are again, at work, drinking coffee."
"Another day closer to death at least"
"Yeah, that about sums it up."

Ugh, they're the worst. Don't be like those assholes. Be like these assholes!


"Well, here we are again... Say, what's with that weird purple coffee cup, Karen?"
"It's a Ridiculously Inconsistent Cup, Doug! The artwork is from an awesome book titled "A Ridiculously Inconsistent Treasury" that compiles all the best material from this awesome blog, "A Ridiculously Inconsistent Trickle of Consciousness"
"Really, Karen? Awesome? Totally awesome? Are these things really awesome, in that they inspire awe? Like I'll be awestruck if I read them?"
"Well... no. But I'm banging the author so I'm sort of obligated to say that."
"..."
"..."
"Were you planning on telling me about this, Karen?"
"No, Brenda, I wasn't."
"Cool mug, Karen."
"Thanks, Doug."
"Oh, can it, Doug. Tool."

See? Conversation starter!
If that doesn't inspire you to buy an overpriced coffee cup, I don't know what will. Somebody asked me, "do you expect to make a lot of money with this?", and I said, "of course not; what's funny about that?". Anywho, if you want to order one or a dozen (actually, if people ordered dozens at a time, I would make money AND that would be pretty funny), please visit the online store at clarkbrooks.com

1 comment:

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