Here's an idea: let your Facebook timeline do your thinking for you! You're staring at it all day anyway. Have your "Friends®" tell you what to do via telling you what they're doing!
Here are actual updates from my® timeline and the costume ideas they inspirated.
BAT THING
"So I rescued this little bat this morning. He or she is taking a little rest while we wait for the rescue lady to come check him out. His head is about the size of a dime."
- Find a bat.
- Make him bite you (this should be easy, especially if you rub yourself all over with some rotting fruit).
- Assume the radioactive powers of the Bat and patrol the night streets of Golem City! Or become a baby Dracula with a dime-sized head.
- Trickety Treat!
BINGO BLITZ
"Roaring Lions, Spinning Wheels, Are You Ready For Thrills and Chills?"
A PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE COMPLAINT ADDRESSED TO SOMEONE WHO INCONVENIENCED YOU
"Roaring Lions, Spinning Wheels, Are You Ready For Thrills and Chills?"
- It's a game or something.
- I don't know.
A PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE COMPLAINT ADDRESSED TO SOMEONE WHO INCONVENIENCED YOU
"Dear train conductor who felt the need to blast the horn a gazillion times at 1:30 am and again at 6am waking my kids, but especially me, I thank you. It's bad enough they were all up at different times during the night yet the times they were actually asleep you came thru our little town."
- Label an inflatable sex doll to represent what it is that annoyed you. In this case, "Safety of others; specifically motorists and pedestrians who might benefit from knowing that a train was coming".
- Have angry, violent sex with it.
- Repeat a gazillion times or until someone shoots you in the face.
- Knock knock! Who's there? Candy!
FOOD SOMEONE ATE
"Late lunch today. Burger lettuce wrap."
- Stand in the middle of some green fabric.
- Turn around in a circle as many times as it takes for the green fabric be all around you.
- You did it right if nobody gives a shit, just like how people reacted to this status update that inspired the concept.
- Thick or threat!
You know what? This is harder than I thought it would be. Let's abandon this premise and just go back to slutting it up. Only let's be clever and get all topical and timely with it!
NAUGHTY REFUGEE®
"Get your hands off me...or all over me. Whatever. Halloween!" |
Yowza!
SLUTTY, ARBITRARILY DEVOUT RELIGIOUS ZEALOT/LOW-LEVEL GOVERNMENT BUREAUCRAT ®
Hubba hubba!
SEXY TRUMP
"Boo!" |
*Burp*
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