Ridiculously inconsistent trickle of consciousness: Stupid fingers

Friday, July 29, 2011

Stupid fingers

"Why don't you go ahead
and give this a sniff, pal?"

Fingers.
They can help us do so, so many things.
Play musical instruments.
Open containers with food inside of them.
Count things (often, up to and including 10 items).
Ruin childhoods.
That's what one family in Texas is claiming, after this picture was taken at their 4-year-old's birthday party held at a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant. They say that Chuck (or is it Chuck E. and if so, is he in love?), appeared at the child's birthday seemingly against his will (although I don't know what other will a cartoon mouse who doesn't even DO cartoons and whose sole reason for existence is to appear at birthday parties at his eponymous pizza restaurant would even have) and flashed the bird as a form of protest, thereby ruining the picture, and presumably, his life. This bodes ill for many...

Don't mess with Texans

For their part, Chuck E. Corporate says give us a break, it's a costume and the gloves don't even have five fingers. The one you see extended in that picture is the totally innocent index finger, not the filthy degenerate middle one. He's saying, "you're number one, birthday buddy!"

Plus, it's a mouse; it can probably be argued that there aren't any fingers.

I don't know. Sounds to me like somebody is dropping some not-so-subtle hints about the possibility of a chintzy lawsuit designed to wring a settlement out of the bad-pizza-and-animatronic-entertainment moguls that run Chuck E. Cheese. It's amazing how deeply offended/litigious people can be when they think there might be some easy cash at stake. After all, if you look around you can find inadvertent obscene gestures everywhere without even trying hard...