Thursday, December 26, 2013

Merry (day after) Christmas 2013

"You know, Mildred, I don't believe that boy actually knows how to play that guitar..." 
Hey, did you get everything opened, played with, cleaned up, cooked and eaten yesterday? Ready to sit back, relax and enjoy the cheery, warm afterglow of the season? Well, go ahead. You've earned it. Let me play a little song for you while you do, all right? Okay, good.

Christmas is over (if you want it) 
Originally wriiten and published December 26, 2008 

(This is in C, if you're singing along) 
So this was Christmas 
And what did I do'd? 
Sat in my apartment 
And ate Chinese food 

And so this was Christmas 
Without any cryin' 
Caught up on old re-runs 
Of Conan O'Brien 

(This is the part where my Japanese girlfriend, an off-the-wall avant-garde conceptual artist who would absolutely refuse to wear a school girl's uniform no matter what, would join in...if I had one) 
A semi-Merry Christmas 
Crack open a beer 
Let's try to get excited 
About a Happy New Year 

(me again) 
And so this was Christmas 
Guess I'll take down the tree 
Or just leave it up all year 
For the neighbors to see 

I'm almost that lazy 
And I could start a new trend 
What do you think, 
Japanese conceptual artist girlfriend? 

(She would sing in Courier for some reason. I don't know why) 
Everybody loves a freak show 
That's why we are here 
But that idea is stupid 
Without merit, I fear 

(Children's choir joins in...) 
Christmas is over 
Quit your whin-ing 
Get off your ass 
Do some shop-ping 
(repeat until you feel utterly compelled to get up and go to Best Buy)

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