Wednesday, April 25, 2007

A short conversation about nutrition

"You shouldn't drink so much soda. Soda has zero nutritional value"
"You're wrong. It's made from fruit like grapes and oranges and the meat from the exotic cola tree, so it has all the cool food groups in it. Plus it tastes good."
"Well, did you know that drinking a soda every day will result in an additional two pounds of weight gained over the course of a year?"
"Wow, seriously? That's pretty good!"
"What's good about gaining two pounds from drinking soda?"
"Are you kidding? I can eat whatever I want and as long as I drink a soda every day, I'll only gain a measly two pounds over a whole year? I'll take it!"
"You're not listening. What I said was..."
"So, I could order, like, five whole, cheese! Five whole cheeseCAKES at one sitting and as long as I remember to wash them down with a delicious ice-cold Pepsi, I will gain virtually no weight whatsoever!"
"Of course not. That's stupid."
"You said that drinking soda every day is an important part of effectively managing your weight."
"That is not at all what I said."
"I believe your exact words were 'A soda a day keeps more than 2 pounds of fat a year away', which is a very catchy slogan. Nice job."
"Listen to me and this time pay attention..."
"Oh have a soda and relax, fatass."

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