Tuesday, October 07, 2008

True Life update: The downstairs apartment

Readers of this blog might wonder exactly how full of crap I really am. The answer is: Quite...but not completely. To wit, I recently wrote about the apartment directly beneath mine being abandoned and unsecured for a long time now and that the people who probably should care, don't. Not all of the story I wrote is completely factual, although enough of it is to still qualify as being true. Here are photos of the actual apartment that I took this afternoon.

Here's the door. No need to ring the doorbell. Just turn the knob and walk right in. I do, whenever I want, like today. It's been unlocked for at least a month now.

Here we are, in the Grand Foyer. NOTE: This apartment is identical to mine, except mine has more, and different stuff in it.
Here's one of the two DVD players I saw when I was in there before. The other one is gone now so somebody else has been in there. What? No, I did not take it. Honestly.
This is the den. That's a computer. I didn't look at it last time but that's what it is. There's no monitor or printer or any other peripherals.

I call this masterpiece "Still life of a kitchen sink with some dishes, Tupperware and an empty Diet Coke bottle". It symbolizes man's eternal-yet-ultimately-futile pursuit of the ultimate truth.
Uh-oh, I don't think that qualifies as normal wear-and tear. Somebody is not getting their deposit back.
They left behind a phone book! Do you know how difficult it is to get one of those? If it weren't for the rain-saturated pallet full of them that has been sitting by the communal mailbox since May, I might have said "moderately".
Luggage. The last time I was in there, the suitcase was sitting upright and was closed. Do you think there were stacks of money in there, like in gangster movies? Yeah, me neither.
That would be a pair of pants.

Past due notices.


Kelly said...

Awesome. Simply awesome. Can't wait for the next update. By the way, where are the pimps and the hookers? Can you leave some fingerprints around in there the next time you go in?

Anonymous said...

That is so weird!

Ann-atomically Correct said...

Just out of curiosity...how did you discover the door was unlocked? I mean do we all need to be concerned that as a hobby you walk around trying door knobs?

Why, it's Clark! said...

Kelly - I'm guessing there's enough DNA floating around in there already without me giving the folks at CSI something to worry about.

Ann - The door was closed but didn't look like it was closed tightly. One day, out of curiosity, I pushed it and it opened right up.
That said, yeah, it wouldn't be a bad idea to be concerned about that. You never know.

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