Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The week in review, as determined by the crap left on my front door

We all know the economy is bad. Stores are closing, jobs are being eliminated, people everywhere are scaling back. However, there's one industry that is apparently still thriving; the distributors of crap that is put on people's front doors. Here's what I got at my place just last week (just imagine if my apartment complex didn't have those two "No Soliciting" signs posted!)

MONDAY, DECEMBER 15 - Season's greetings from the management of my complex. Well, that's nice! Certainly nicer than other notes they could have left like "your rent check bounced" or "turn your music down" or "for the last time, either stop leaving your blinds open or start wearing pants". I kept this one.

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 16 - DirecTV Flyer promising lots of free stuff. Hmm, I like free stuff. Free stuff fits nicely within my budget. I like that a lot. What I don't like is this:

That looks like a lot of fine print hidden under that big, white sticker. Plus, you have to be suspicious of a company that spends money on fancy, die-cut advertising flyers. I'm gonna pass on this one.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 17 - Chinese food take-out menu. The people at this restaurant recognize you don't need fancy die-cut holes when you have staples and rubber bands. Kudos! But Chinese food tastes the same no matter where you get it from and I'm sure I already have several take-out menus inside so I don't need another one. Plus, there's this:

This place is 3.2 miles from my house. Somebody drove out of their delivery zone to deliver a take-out menu to me from a restaurant that won't deliver to me.

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 18 - In-home computer repair services. It says they're available "24/7" which is easily one of the most overused (and annoying) phrases in the English language. Still, if it's true, this is something that could come in real handy. If not, it'll be something I can complain about later. I'll keep this one.

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 19 - Pizza take-out menu. Like Chinese food, I'm sure I have scads of pizza menus laying around. Unlike Chinese food, all pizza is not the same. And around here, good pizza is hard to find. I don't know why that is. I'm not usually prone to pointing out how things are better "up north", but in the case of pizza, it's true. It seems like every little podunk 'burg around where I grew up had/has at least one outstanding little local pizza joint. I live in a much bigger metropolitan area now and those places are few and far between. So I'm always open to giving a place a chance. Although, I have to say this seems more than a little exploitative and doesn't excite me:

Tentative keeper. We'll see how their pizza is.

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 20 - Some kind of religious solicitation. This one went straight into the shit can (well, right after I took a picture of it). I don't even know what the pitch is and I don't care. Does this make me close-minded? Maybe. But people trying to sell me their version of the Truth usually lose me the moment they capitalize the T. Sorry, that's just the way it is. My front door, my rules.

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