Friday, January 09, 2009

How I'm going to get rich in 2009

This one is SURE to work!
I just saw an ad on tv for Hooters. They're running a promotion where each store is giving away an HD flat screen television at each one of their restaurants. All you have to do is go in there and eat to be entered into the drawing. You get an entry every time you go.
Here's the plan:
I'm going to eat lunch and dinner (they're not open for breakfast) every day, earning two entries a day between now and February 1st, when they pick the winner. To save money, I'm just going to order a pack of saltine crackers and a glass of ice water. "But sir, crackers aren't really a meal. They're not even on the menu", they'll say. I'll reply, "But that's what I want and the customer is always right. I don't mind paying for them. How much?" "Geez, I don't know. A quarter?" "Outrageous! But fine. One pack of saltine crackers and an ice water, please. Free refills, right?". I won't be leaving a tip.
Then, with about 60 entries in the pot, there's virtually no chance I won't win. If by some miracle I don't, I will sue them for rigging the contest against me because I didn't tip. I'll have spent around $15.00 and either be the owner of a brand new HD television or the winner of a lucrative judicial settlement.
I don't see how this can possibly fail.

1 comment:

Johnny Fonts said...

There is a John Grisham novel in here someplace.

OOH, there you go: Book deal! Film rights!