Saturday, March 19, 2011

Muffin update: a good idea

The state of Georgia weeps
This is a picture of something I saw at a neighborhood corner market the other day (in the cooler, of course): Mogen David 20/20, also known as "Mad Dog", Peaches and Cream.
This is a very, very bad thing and buying it with the intention of drinking it, even as a goof, is a very, very bad idea.
In case you don't know, "Mad Dog" is what is known as a "fortified wine". What it's fortified with is an alcohol content between 15% and 20% plus artificial colors and flavors and sugar. This, along with similar wines of it's ilk like Nighttrain, Ripple and Thunderbird, are only to be consumed if you can't get your hands on anything else, either due to constraints resulting from financial status or parental rules. That's because it's as liable to make you sick as it is to get you drunk...and it will get you drunk. If you're shopping in a store that carries this product, you're flirting dangerously close to the rocky bottom as it is. Don't fall victim to a bad idea by imbibing this swill.

A better idea is to donate to my campaign to battle cancer by raising $1500 for Relay For Life, which will also result in Tre Amici @ The Bunker in Ybor City naming a muffin after me. For just $10 you can help in the fight against a disease that continues to destroy people's lives, plus help me become world famous among muffin enthusiasts for eternity plus win a gift basket of the darned things for yourself...or you could buy a couple of bottles of shitty wine that will make you pass out in your own sick. Doesn't really seem like a difficult choice to me.

OR MAIL CHECKS AND/OR MONEY ORDERS (payable to The American Cancer Society) TO ME AT:
3655 Coopers Pond Drive, #202,
Tampa, FL, 33614


Jeff Hickmott said...

Very nice segue, Clark! I see what ya did there. By the way, I love the weird words that they make me type in for the word verification on the comment box. The one directly below is 'auboring' which, if it isn't already a real word, ought to be.

Why, it's Clark! said...

Thanks, Jeff! Not too subtle? Good!

Also, what would the definition of 'auboring' be?
AUBORING (aw-bohr-ing) adj. - Causing or marked by being unimpressed with the fall season: "Autumn? More like Auboring."